"The doctor sees all her breast cancer patients at the oncology center" says the secretary.
"Shit I am the BREAST CANCER PATIENT", says the chick with stupid dumb breast cancer.
The appointment yesterday was long, draining, and depressing. They are under construction for the new cancer treatment center and let me tell you it looks so sad. These poor people go down this crazy hall into the bowels of the hospital waiting for Freddy Kruger to jump out to get treatment for hours and end up feeling like a mack truck ran them over. When the very nice receptionist took my info I almost said "this is so depressing for these patients", then I realized I am the patient. I do not do patient well. I do a lot of other things very well but be a patient helllllsssss noooooo. The magazines in the waiting room were dated 2005, I mean come on get us cancer people some updated US weekly.
The meeting with the doctor verified that I do have breast cancer, hmmmm really??? Although it is the best breast cancer you can have, "it is just DCIS", it is still cancer. That is not great and should not be taken lightly. She really would have thought it was a papilloma and says my cause is "rare". I guess I really do have to be different on all levels. This doctor agreed with my doctor and thinks my course of treatment is right. At the surgery the doctor will test my lymph nodes on both sides, checking the level of cancer. They will know then if there is more cancer but still send it out to be checked. There is a 20% chance it comes back negative at surgery then in lab is positive. That must be a fun chat, "sorry we were kidding it isn't negative after all, would you like a barf bag?". The whole boob then goes off to be dissected and tested (think they send it to FM High School for science class??). After all that they will decide on which steps to take from there. I have to keep chemo in my head somewhere just to be prepared. It is hard up in my brain there are a lot of voices up there and right now they have a LOT to say. If I do not need chemo then yippeee if I do then I will be ready but I will not go there until then. Plus until all the results are in we will not be able to breath any sigh of relief!
I am still in shock and feel like this is some sick friggin joke. I made deals with the breast gods that if I did all that work for Race for the Cure I would go untouched by breast cancer. Stupid dumb breast cancer!!! Cancer does not hold any prejudices it slaps whoever it wants. Please get mammos and do self breast examines, early detection saved my life. Do not be a fool and think "it won't happen to me" cause you are me! Well, I am more fabulous than most but you know what I mean:)