Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Every princess has her king….

Today is my dad's birthday, 76!!! Let me tell you about my dad. First off he is a royal pain in the ass. He asks me the same friggin thing about 50 times a day then calls me 6 times to repeat it, not at all cause he is old but  he just wants to hear my voice (I know for a fact he does the same to my siblings). He is the meaning of grandfather, he takes that role very seriously. "Cause I'm the Pa" is a famous quote. The love that he gives all his grandkids is no joke, Matt, Nicole, Jess, Lowell, Ben, Natalie, Sam, Anthony and Julian all love their grandfather with such intensity it almost frightens me. They all love and need their Pa as much as he needs them.  I am so happy he takes care of himself, does he look 76?!?!  

My father is the most emotional man you will ever meet, seriously he can cry over anything but when it comes to his kids, grand kids, Deb and family let the water works begin. No really it is sort of the joke, "oh here he goes". I actually plan my gifts around how much he will cry. He lost the love of his life at a time when they were just building a family and never really recovered. He did the best job he could raising us with the help of family, I think he did just fine. Sure we can find something to bitch about that he didn't do but the truth of the matter is he gave us love real love. His love is pure and unconditional no matter what, believe me I was no angel (and my brother and sister, wow!!!) but not once did I ever feel unloved.
My father is a major and I mean MAJOR shopper, which worked out great in my teenage years. You people think I have a shoe issue?? The man buys 2 pairs of each shoe and rotates them so they don't wear out. He never questions my shopping excursions and loves to buy gifts, win win win!  When Deb moved in he was more worried about losing closet space than anything else. 

When I look back I realize that my relationship with him is so different than my siblings, more so than the average. By the time Al and Lori (they are 9 and 10 years older than me) were out of the house my father was just coming out of the fog from my mother's death, he was waking up. I was always his baby princess, I took his mind off the tragedy. So we did a lot together, a lot!  He called me his shadow, "me and my shadow, walking down the avenue"!  Sure there were all sorts of teenage ups and downs, too many to write and some completely illegal, but again there was nothing but love. My first son was premature and my father rushed to Albany and stayed there until my baby came home. Yes I grow up motherless but my father was amazing he was filling the void beyond expectation! 

The day I found out I had breast cancer my father was watching Julian. He knew follow up  appointment was to my lumpectomy so I had to tell him. He was stunned, I will never forget that face. "What?" Was said about 40 times, then the tears. I looked at him and said "if I'm not crying you can't. This is my breast cancer and I decide who cries", he stopped and never once, not once did he cry I front of me through all this. He stood by my and my boys with strength and faith that I never thought possible. He has seen all the pictures and has been at the hospital never once showing me fear. My brother told me that on the way to my mastectomy he thought if my dad was crying he was going to throw him right out of my room because I didn't need that. My father showed him who was king! He laughed, made jokes, and smiled with me the whole time. Sure he was scared the pictures show that but he emitted strength. I have never been more proud to be my dad's baby princess than that day. I simply love him.

Today is his birthday and I want nothing but happiness for him. He deserves it! Last year I helped him get a ring for Deb and he asked her to marry him. She is the best thing for him, she balances him and keeps him out of my hair. Ok ok so she is younger than my brother and only 5 months older than my sister, she is still the best! Keep your jokes to yourself, hahaha.  I love Deb and am proud to have her part of the family, he has done good!  To be honest I don't know how she puts up with him but she loves him and he loves her. I pictured them married this winter but breast cancer had other ideas. Maybe this year?! I sure do hope so.

So happy birthday daddy! I am so lucky to have a pops like you. Don't forget you promised me a tattoo, not another for me but YOU!!! I'm so excited and you wouldn't want to disappoint me after this year....xo
My race for the cure daddy!
Never leaves my side

My walk with my king on my side
Holding it together
Pure happiness and love

scared but strong