Monday, July 8, 2013

Just keeping it interesting



No shit

 
I just don't even know where to begin. Lets start with what makes me mad then we can get to what pisses me off part. I went to the plastic surgeon today. I actually wasn't too nervous because I needed them to look at my scars. They are red, swollen, painful and just not right. I knew something had to be done because my Patrick Fuller couldn't do much more with the massaging they hurt horrible. He even tried a little cupping, OUCH!!!  I am not a wimp I'm a lot of other things but not a wimp. So she decided to try injections, great a needle!  She did about 7 pricks and wow fucking wow. My eyes watered, I felt nothing but nerve pain. I know you are saying "but you can't feel anything" it's not the same it's more like pain in the skin. She wanted to do more but I physically couldn't handle it. I know wimp, pansy, wuss call me whatever that shit hurt. I am not to touch or massage the area for over a week, ha it hurts so bad right now there is no way in hell I am touching it. Tom better not even think about it. So if that doesn't work maybe laser or surgery to fix the scars but first we need to figure out what's going on with these implants. I'm sorry come again....

For weeks I have been bitching these implants have been in my arm pits, they have been choking me, didn't feel right, looked too fake but I blew it off because it must just be how it is supposed to be. They are fake boobs after all they aren't meant to be real BUT my PS is the man for boobs and these aren't comfortable. I even thought about not having any taking them out completely that is how uncomfortable they are.

Well guess what .... They are not right. They are shifting to my arm pits, they are "dimpling" at the right breast, you can actually see/feel the implant and they are too rounded not sitting right. So bye fucking bye! Yup you heard me another surgery. They are coming out before I have arm pit boobs, who the hell wants those except circus freaks (no comments here!) September 20 I just can't believe it. I could leave it but really they are not right and shifting, who wants that! Easy cancer my left tit! there is no such thing. Are you glad I am done? I swear if you say that to me I will clock you and by clock I mean punch directly in the face even if I have to stand on a stool. 


Back to the drawing board. I'm a work in progress. Under construction. Being a mess is exhausting. All I can can say is this will require some bad ass heels, this princess is think Jimmy! Or Christian! Or Tory! So many options. 

14 comments:

  1. Oh AM.... WHAT.The.FUCK??????? You must be kidding me.... I'm here if you want to talk.... And I love you.... xoxox

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  2. I feel sick that this is happening to you, AM. Gawd, what the hell?! When I read how long you have to wait too, I thought again... "What the hell??" :-(

    I don't know if this is ok to say cos I've read so many blog posts about mastectomy/cancer patients getting pissed off cos people say the "wrong thing" to them... so please pardon me if it's wrong to say "You know what I would do....???" but please know I mean it with the best of intentions. OK? XOXOXOXO

    You know what the hell I would do?! Hands down, without a shadow of a doubt, absolutely? I totally would NOT get implants cos fake just ain't for me. But what I WOULD do is get me a totally badass chest piece tattoo instead of implants. Like this one here:

    http://cdn.ph.upi.com/sv/i/UPI-7281361310180/2013/1/13613123144169/Facebook-removes-photo-of-breast-cancer-survivors-chest-tattoo-picture-goes-viral.jpg

    And then I'd walk around topless all day. I swear to gawd!!

    :-)

    Gorgeous chest piece like this, topless, high heels.... you go, girl. Who the hell needs implants. Not you!! Get those damn things jerked!!

    The biggest & gentlest hug I can muster comin' at ya from Indiana, dear heart. I haven't commented in awhile (nor blogged myself in like forever!) but I read your every post... and pray for ya everday... without fail.

    ~Andrea
    XOXOXOXOXOXOXO

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    1. I am thinking just that, really. But I just don't know. UGHHHHH xo

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  3. I am so sorry, Ann Marie. I just don't know what to say. As if cancer wasn't bad enough. xoxoxo

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    1. Cancer can suck it! I, you, and all the other warriors do not need these after effects!! XOOXO Love me some Sarcastic Boob!

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  4. WOW! I am so sorry! My FOOBs hurt all the time as well. I am about ready to get mine OUT too! I have an appointment with my PS next week. Do you think our FOOBs suck because we have no muscle to help those implants? Sorry that you have had to go through all that crappy-non-necessary-lousy-stinking-pain. Is there another doc that can get you into surgery sooner? I think you should stomp your foot (in a pair of awesome heels, of course) and get this taken care of sooner. I have lymphadema in my left FOOB - I'd hate for you to get that as well. Sometimes I'm not sure these doctors realize how painful these types of things can be. Hang in there - you're awesome (and so not a wimp)! XO

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    1. PLEASE stay on top of it. I actually compared my cleavage to what it looked like right after the swap to now, WOW they are so separated!! XOX please if something isn't right or feels funny check it out

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  5. Bah, I'm so sorry to hear you need another surgery, and they're not right? But of course they aren't, eh, armpit boobs don't sound too normal - though how would you have known? So, so sorry you need to jump yet another hurdle. ~Catherine

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  6. OY! Armpit foobs are for TE's not implants. Sounds like you need some internal reinforcement (maybe alloderm?), extra stitching, and perhaps smaller implants?

    I have been through the mud and back in my quest to be reconstructed. The term tells you all you need to know: I look put-back-together a la Mrs. Humpty Dumpty. Lefty's IMF is an inch lower than righty's (IMF line got compromised during surgery and PS tried to repair it but it didn't take and I am OVER surgery at the moment so am living with my unmatched, uneven, unperfect foobs. And after all we've been through, I wanted just a smidgeon of perfection in the foob dept! (Hey, a gal can dream.)

    Hang in there.
    {{{hugs}}}

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  7. I'm so sorry to hear this, AM. To say that sucks would be a major understatement.

    My implant on my right side has shifted toward my arm pit, but definitely not the extent to which you are describing. That sounds awful and beyond uncomfortable.

    *gentle hugs*

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  8. On second thought, with "tit pits" you could have some crazy ass fun. Flash people by lifting your arms--Mardi Gras would never be the same.

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  9. "I'm sorry to hear about what happened. That is absolutely a bummer but hang in there! Hopefully this time around, they can come up with a ""masterpiece"" out of that drawing board. I'm not sure about your situation and if this applies to you but a friend told me about this technology called AeroForm. Maybe it could be of help:

    http://www.airxpanders.com/

    I just want you to know that your blog is amazing and I admire how you tackle each situation with such courage and humor -- not something a lot of us can do. Wishing you all the best! "

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